Have you been thinking of going for your very first therapy session but are wondering what you can speak about? Maybe you are thinking if you are going to be judged, that your feelings are childish or that your problems are too insignificant to be addressed in therapy.
Have you ever been met with statements such as “your life is great, you don’t need therapy” or heard people say “ therapy is only for those who have issues”? Have these comments and your own apprehensions regarding therapy kept you from taking the first step?
Well, the truth is, in therapy, you can speak about anything under the sun. The whole process may seem complex and anxiety-provoking. When you go for therapy, you may go in wanting to speak about your relationship, but will end up speaking about something else drastically different! What you discuss in therapy is often a reflection of your mood at the time.
We often feel like we should have a plan, a list of issues we want to bring up. While that is one way to go about it, a lot more gets unravelled over the sessions that we might have never even imagined.
If this sounds familiar and you’re looking for a sign to get yourself for that first session, this is your sign! Read on to know more about what you can discuss at therapy.
For starters, you could bring up your hesitation, apprehensions, and skepticism regarding therapy. Whether you have any beliefs and preconceived notions about being in therapy.
Perhaps, you’ve watched a movie and you see therapists a certain way, or you’ve heard friends speak about their first therapy experience ever and you’re wondering if this may even be worth your time and money?
This could be a great beginning in therapy and it’s never a bad idea to address these concerns. And remember, every experience is unique and your therapist can guide you through that process.
So what else now? I’ve addressed my concerns. Why am I still blanking out?
It may help to think of your life in themes and then address them. These themes could be your relationships, family, emotions, past, or your work life.
Below are some common areas in life where we may encounter problems.
Relationships
Have you been struggling with your relationship and feeling distressed with regard to your partner? Wondering why your partner cannot see your efforts? Or you’re thinking about that friend who ghosted you and you now want closure?
Well, you can speak about all the important people in your life, those you love, those you hate, people who make your blood boil, and people who feel like a warm hug.
Need an ear for you to vent? Therapists are there for you, to hear you out, with no judgments or bias. Be it, needing some guidance or wanting to reflect on why your partner might be hurt, your therapist is armed with various skills to keep you going.
They might not have all the answers to your questions, but they can guide you to answer your own questions and see things in a different light.
Work
Are you unhappy at work and find that you are constantly stressed out? Or feel like you are stuck in a rut because certain life goals are not being met?
Maybe your therapist can help you understand the underlying reason, which would seem very minute to you. They could also help you create a plan to meet your goals or reach those deadlines. If you feel like you’re finding it difficult to concentrate and pay attention to important things at work, your therapist has all the interventions handy.
Emotions
Do you sometimes feel like just crying it all out? Or thought about why laughing so hard led you to a pool of tears?
Your vast array of emotions is also something you can address at therapy. Be it all the things that make you angry or all the things you are afraid of. The emotional roller coasters can be a positive route to finding other affected areas in your life.
Childhood
Do the experiences I’ve gone through in my childhood determine the person I am today?
The truth is your childhood does play a role in the way you feel and think and the behavior you engage in later in life. Past trauma, lack of a parental figure, attachment issues, bullying, and much more shape who you are today.
It is important to remember that therapy isn’t about addressing just the negative aspects. Talk about all the positive things that have happened to you recently, all the things that make you happy, all the successes you’ve experienced, and all the times you thought you wouldn’t make it, but you did. Bring up all the things in therapy that have helped you so far
What are some things I cannot tell my therapist?
Absolutely nothing! The truth is you really can trust your therapist with anything. Spill all the beans. Not letting them know only pulls you back. There are no exhaustive lists of things you can and cannot speak about. Be it anxiety, depression, or that you are frustrated with the traffic, or that you hate your boss, your therapist is here for it all.
Think of therapy as a road trip. You start from your house and eventually reach your destination. You might stop for some food, to capture some sunsets, or to use the bathroom. You might encounter some speed breakers, bumpy roads, or even a punctured tyre. The journey continues and when you’ve reached your destination, you look back on all the memories. Some are happy, others not so happy, yet you’ve learned.
Therapy is similar. At some point, all the layers of your life will begin to unfurl, sometimes they may be difficult and at other times easy, but we gather the skills and resources to tackle them efficiently, through therapy.
Lastly, keep in mind that progress takes time. It can take some time before you notice any changes or feel like you’ve gained insight during certain sessions. There are times when it may seem like a session was particularly beneficial, and at other times the sessions may seem less fruitful. The key is to keep track of your progress and feelings and remember never to hold back on those secrets!
Comments